I've collected my favorite quotes from Eddings' books. Some of these were added by me but most of them are contributions from other devoted Eddings fans.
Thanks to all of you who have helped with this collection of quotations.

Thanks to Jax for these ones:

Category: Funny

"What are we supposed to do?" Kalten asked her. "It's really quite simple, Kalten," Ulath said. "You watch Tynian very closely. As soon as he begins behaving like a butterfly, tell Sparhawk about it. I'll watch you for signs of froggishness. Just as soon as you start trying to catch flies with your tongue, I'll know that you're starting to lose your grip on things."

Source: The Sapphire Rose - Chapter 22

Category: Funny

"Ulath?" he said suspiciously. "Yes Kalten?" "In all the time we've been travelling together, I haven't seen you cook more than once or twice." "No, you probably haven't." "When does your turn come?" "It doesn't. My job is to keep track of whose turn it is. You wouldn't really expect me to do that and cook, too, would you? Fair is fair, after all." "Who appointed you?" "I volunteered. Church Knights are supposed to do that when unpleasant tasks come up. That's one of the reasons people respect us so much."

Source: The Sapphire Rose - Chapter 22

Thanks to the Grand Bard Myrmidoni for this one:

Category: Funny

"'Ce'Nedra!' he exclaimed, junping out of bed to follow her. 'What are you doing?' " 'I'm throwing up,' she replied, raising her pale face from the basin she was holding on her knees. 'Are you sick?' 'No,' she drawled sarcastically. 'I'm doing this for fun."

Source:Guardians of the West

Thanks to Sarrasi for this one:

Category: Funny

Silk, his eyes alight with mischief, rode at her [Ce'Nedra] side on the sunny midmorning of the last day of their journey from Mal Gemila. "Beware, you Majesty," he warned her slyly as they neared the crest of a hillside sheathed in pale sprin grass so verdant that it almost looked like a filmy green mist. "The first sight of Mal Zeth has sometimes struck the unwary traveler blind. To be safe, why don't you cover one eye with your hand? That way you can preserve at least partial sight.

Source:Demon Lord of Karanda - Chapter 5

Thanks to Lisa Robertson for this one:

Category: Funny

" I was reading an old text on the exploits of Belgarath the Sorcerer, and I -" Senji stopped, going very pale, turned and gaped at Garion's grandfather. "It's a terrible letdown, isn't it?" Beldin said. "We always told him he ought to look more impressive" "You're in no position to talk," the old man said. "You're the one with the earthshaking reputatiion." Beldin shrugged. "I'm just a flunky. I'm along for comic relief"

Source:Sorceress of Darshiva - Chapter 7